My Mini Road Trip

So yesterday I had to drive to Brockville. My co-worker who usually works at that office was still feeling a bit sick and couldn't go. Her head was feeling a bit foggy and that doesn't make for good driving. (She's pregnant and we don't want her taking any chances) So my boss loaned me her car to get to Brockville. Sounds easy enough right?

Wrong!

I work downtown Kingston, so I figure the quickest way would be to go over the scarey bridge and take the next exit to the 401. I say scarey bridge...mainly because I have this irrational fear of driving on bridges over water. But it's also a metal grate bridge that lifts for boats to pass under. So when you're driving over the bridge, it's REALLY noisy. I usually like to open my window when driving on a bridge over water. You never know...the bridge could malfunction and swallow my car up and drown me while trapped in the car!

Anyways...

I took the turn off that I swore said '401 this way'. So I'm driving.....and driving...and driving...going through construction...driving some more...crap! there is farm land around me! I haven't seen any signs advertising the 401! Am I going to Smith Falls? Where am I going? I don't have a map and I don't know where in the world I am heading!!! Red neck country? Are there inbreeders??? So I decided to play it safe...I turn around and go back the way I came. Back through the construction and turn left onto #2 highway. I look at the other side of the road...and it points to the direction I just came from and says '401 this way'. BLOODY HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Screw it! I'm just going to go on hwy 2 until I come to the next cut off. I get trapped behind a stinkin' yellow bus. Putt...putt...putt...putt. Dude...gas is the peddle on the right. Do the flamin' speed limit!!!! Then the bus turns off and I get some truck with a trailer attached to it's behind. Trees laying in the back of the trailer were waving at me...taunting me! Lucky I didn't have a chain saw! This guy isn't doing the speed limit either. I AM LATE!!!! I decide to pass.....

I'm going over 100 .... slightly over the speed limit of 80. I'm on the opposite side of the road...

I see a sign ... '401 this way'.

CRAP!

Slam on the brakes!!! SCREEEEEEEECH!!! Turn the corner....mad woman on the loose boys! I just barely made that turn. I thought I would end up in that farmers field. Driving by farmland again...but I don't care...I'm driving until I find that stinkin 401 hwy. Finally I find it. WOOO HOOOOO!!!!! Now I know where I'm going. I thought that would be the end of my adventures for the day.

Um no...

I get to the office and decide to go pee before I open the office. Especially knowing the size of my bladder. (Let's just say it's small) I start to unbutton my pants....

PING....

My button goes flying and hits the opposite wall. You have got to be kidding me!!!!!!!! It's a good thing my pants had an inside button as backup. Thank you Mr. designer man!

Oh yeah, by the way...on my return travel, I decided to take the exit that I had screwed up so badly. That would be the 1st one that I couldn't find. Turns out I was only 1 1/2 minutes away from the 401 on my original trip.

Oh well,

I know for next time.